{May 26, 2013}   I am alone….

Someone single said that she is miserable.  When I asked why, she said she is tired and alone.  I immediately responded “Me too.”

I am married, I have three kids.  I am completely alone.  My husband works so much he doesn’t recognize his children.  My best friend from childhood is far away and unreachable for many reasons.  No Dad, Mom, siblings.  No friends.

So here I sit, broken hearted….

Is there anyone out there?  Call me, lets get together….

I want to go up in a hot air balloon…

Fly in a helicopter…



Hunt (this fall/winter will be my first bow hunt.  Anyone in WI or IL know a place to hunt?)

I want to own a horse.  Love her, groom her, feed her, ride her.

I want to learn to paint, create…

I want to drive, fast, oh so fast, race someone else and kick fucking ass…

I want to take my big bad powerful pretty truck and drive it sideways through the mud…

I want to meet a man who becomes my friend, and at some point, needs me, cant keep his hands off of me, completely loses control.

I want a second chance with my mother.  I love you Mamma…


I asked my husband the other day if he felt like an adult. He looked at me like I was crazy, which makes sense, Cuz I am… Then I slapped my own forehead, thinking, I am such a dumbass for asking HIM. He was a fourty year old, prematurely pooping in his pants when he was born.

I’m 35 or 36, I have three children, a mortgage , gray hairs and crows feet. But I do not feel like an adult.

I make dumb jokes. I mean really dumb 12 year old jokes, and think I’m hilarious. I would much rather play with a remote control car, or play fashion show than talk about the latest fashions with my annoying adult neighbor. I think I should get paid for erecting a Barbie Lego mansion than going to a stuffy adult job. (For the record, Barbie Mansions are HARD WORK).

I’ll take a Scooby Doo push pop over Ben and Jerry’s any day. I know the words to Finding Nemo by heart, as my family will readily attest to.

I don’t go to Bath and Body Works. When I want a sweet smelling bubble bath I use Mr. Bubble. (Plus there is WAYto much going on in that store and i cant hang. Where is that red exit sign????).  I have a High School Musical music CD in my car and I love it.

My fave food is Kraft Mac n cheese. I like to blow bubbles and always keep some handy. I paint stars on my fingernails. Chocolate milk? Like manna from Heaven. If my husband would agree, I would have a pretty pink princess canopy bed.

I loved icarly. If you know the dumbass that canceled that show, let me know. And I really love kids. (Not in the creepy pedophile way…) but I would much rather play in the backyard with the kids than hang out inside with their stuffy adult parents.

I love this silly, immature, carefree girl, that is unfortunately only one of my many personalities. I think I’ll keep her around.

I’m a Toys R Us kid.

et cetera