{April 15, 2013}   Redecorating and the Peanut Gallery from Heaven…

My mom came to visit me today. She was behind me by or on the couch. I think she just stopped by to check in, I didn’t feel any urgency in her visit. She was laughing at my feeble attempt at painting.  She always laughs at you, not with you. It used to make me so mad, but now I realize she does it not out of meanness, but to entertain herself. Well, maybe a little out of meanness. God knows, she’s got enough of that to go around.

I told her I was sorry the kids were not home, the are more entertaining than I. She held the ladder for me when I almost fell and rolled her eyes dramatically I’m sure. Pointing out my mistakes again, so like her.

I told her I was sorry I didn’t invite her over more when she was alive, but we both know if she hadn’t died, she still wouldn’t be visiting. Her fault and mine I guess.

There were times in my life when I laid in bed and examined myself, wondering if I even loved her. But I knew, deep down, she always loved me. Maybe more than anyone. I only felt that occasionally, however. She was nuts. Like me. Thanks Mom.

Now I know. I love her and she loves me. Theres no crap to get in the way now. She still laughs at me and acts holier than thou, but shes been to heaven, so I guess I’ll let that pass. For now…


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